Humour can be compared to watching your young child perform at a school concert – it’s often a matter less of taste and more of personal involvement. In this post, for example, we’re trying for a PG rating, so some of the more obviously offensive have been disqualified. However, while keeping things clean, we hope you’ll agree with us that we’ve found the 10 funniest stickers out there.
The Beginning
Before we wade into the selection, here’s a question. When were bumper stickers invented? The sixties? Slightly later? In fact, they appear to be about as old as cars themselves (although that can’t be strictly true, as the Ford Model T didn’t have a bumper). It’s generally believed that custom stickers pre-date World War II – although the term isn’t entirely accurate. The first appeared to be more like small flags and were attached by a wire. These were soon replaced by models using pressure sensitive adhesives – all that now need to be added was, at least in the eyes of their creators, a sense of humour. Nowadays, of course, you can easily use a computer and printer to quickly create your own personal message.
So, without further ado, here are ten bumper funnies you’ll see stuck on the back of cars – from the classics to the ‘so bad they’re good’ variety:
1. Ten Out of Nine Accountants Can’t Count
Included for its ability to annoy a group of people who seem destined to remove fun (and spurious expenses claims) from your life. It’s also good to know that, at their next get-together, there will be a wide-spread debate about the innumeracy of the local population.
2. Horn Broke – Watch for Finger
Included for its inaccuracy, as most times, when you don’t immediately mount the pavement to allow that van behind you to overtake, both horn and digit appear to be working in well-practised harmony.
3. Jesus is Coming – Look Busy
Although many folks might take offence at any religious mentions, and no doubt berate the driver if given a chance; it is funny the confusion that would spread across their face when you realise they probably simply had a Spanish boss.
4. My Other Car is a Child Taxi Too
So funny, in fact listen to the laughter. It’s the easiest way to identify those in any group who don’t actually have children.
5. I’m New at This – What’s your Excuse?
Deserves its place because, those reading it are probably driving six inches away from the car in front, and yet still find it funny. But there are some good variations…
6. Call a Plumber – Repair What your Husband Fixed
Is that the sound of bitter truth echoing round in your head? Best found on a bumper that’s only attached to its vehicle with string.
7. Watch Out for the Moron Behind Me
With the added fun of watching the driver of the following car turn round and look to see if it’s true. *We would not recommend using this sticker… Ever.
8. My Jeep is Using What your Hybrid is Saving
Just for the annoyance factor and the chance to assess how much hot air has just been added to the atmosphere by pent-up hybrid drivers complaining that this is in bad taste.
9. I Fish Therefore I Lie
Not only is this bumper sticker truly annoying and utterly wrong, it was about five feet long. Honestly. We were going to take a picture but it drove away from us as we were setting our camera…
10. Does this Ass make my Bumper Look Big?
There’s a space on this for you to insert a photo of your choice and then print it out… During that short pause, you just thought of somebody, didn’t you? Stop chuckling.
A Final Warning about Bumper Stickers
One American survey discovered that drivers who wanted to show their individuality through using these were more likely to take part in road rage incidents. It was also true that the greater the number plastered on the vehicle, the more trouble you might be in if you’ve just rear-ended them whilst putting on your reading glasses.
We hope you enjoyed our list, although we deliberately kept away from any political humour for two reasons. Firstly, to avoid alienating part of our readership each time; secondly, because the truth isn’t always funny.